Question:
I made the decision not long ago to start a meditation practice. Meditation is something that I have wanted to try for years, though I did not have the courage for a long time.  However, the need for healing and peace has driven me to incorporate it into my daily routine. I already feel it impacting my life.  I am calmer, more at ease and my life feels less frenetic in general.

But I feel myself clinging desperately to the ego.  In the course of the day, I catch myself on numerous occasions playing out some story in my mind that was or has not yet come to pa*s.  This story is inevitably a positive or negative aspect of my ego, but does not have much to do with who I really am.  I also find that I have difficulties letting go.  For instance, there is a friend in my life whom I feel a very deep connection with.  I love talking to and being with this person and would like to have a romantic relationship with him.  I find that this desire keeps me from truly enjoying the time that I spend with my friend.  Not only that, but I allow it to detract from the time that I spend away from him.

My question to you is, how do I let go?  How do I let go of ways of thinking that do not serve me well?

Answer:
I applaud your decision to start meditation. That is a big step in becoming free from the dictates of the conditioned self. It is common to feel frustrated with games the ego plays once you clearly see what it is doing. Be patient and kind to yourself. It took a long time to develop the mental habits you have now, and it only stands to reason that it will take a little time for the higher self to re-establish itself as your true identity.

Continue your meditation practice. Also, when you are out in activity and notice that the ego is interfering with you ability to be present and enjoy what is happening in the moment, just stop and take a breath and remind your self of what your present experience actually is. Not what you wish it would be, or afraid it might become, but what it genuinely is at that moment. If you embrace what is real, you automatically let go of that which is not real.